Food: Marry or Kill?

I’m a foodie. I love food. I also don’t like a lot of food that many people do, so I’ve decided to make a list: Food I love so much, I’d marry it and food that most people like that I really don’t. I may not hate it necessarily, but I could definitely do without. The latter of the lists may cause anger in a few of you. Please know that if I die, I’ve already notified people to check out my readers first. Disclaimer: This post may cause hunger. Sorry?????

If you love food so much, why don’t you MARRY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-Sickest Burn as a Small Child

 

Food I Would Straight Up Marry

  • Caesar Salad. I like the jokes about how gross salad is as much as the next girl, but salad is actually amazing if you make it right. And Caesar? Is right.  Just look at it. I refuse to apologize.
    Caeser-Salad-5
  • Guacamole. Make guac not war, people.
    guac-n-roll-t-shirts-men-s-v-neck-t-shirt-by-canvas
  • Chicken Salad Sandwiches.
    giphy (3).gif
    But a delicious sandwich?
  • Twice Baked Potatoes. They’re the cheesiest! 💪
    twice-baked-potatoes-2b.jpg
    Potatoes are just good. Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew.
    And it’s not just because I’m from Idaho. Fight me.
  • Just Thai food. All of it.
    Hyatt-Regency-Hua-Hin-P242-Talay-Thai-Thai-Food-Set.masthead-feature-panel-medium
    Just look at that aesthetic. Plus it tastes amazing. 
  • Baby dill pickles. The baby part is important. Small and crunchy. It’s kinda a big dill.

 

Get that Food Out of My Face, or SO HELP ME

  • Spaghetti. Starting the anger off right away. Just jumping right in.
    giphy (3).gif
    It’s literally a mess, there’s no way around it. What a terrible date food! Thanks Disney for setting yet another unrealistic expectation. #LadyandtheTramp
  • Mushrooms. It’s a fungus. FUNGUS.
    mush.gif
  • Bacon/Any Pork. Sorry, but it’s disgusting and really bad for you.
    nopeee.gif
    All of you right now, I’m sure.
  • Sunflower Seeds. I can’t. *shudder*
    giphy (4).gif
  • Chocolate Chip Cookies. Hear me out. I do like them. Just…Not with a ton of chocolate chips in them. I do love chocolate, but I just really like the cookie part.

    giphy (5).gif

  • ….Pizza.
    shout.gif
    Everyone settle down. I don’t mind pizza. I will eat pizza. It just…Will never be my first choice for a meal. Sorry not sorry.

 

You can post your angry comments now. Do your worst.
nothing.gif

 

*Insert cheeky peace sign* ✌🏻 Bless.

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